What to Say (and Avoid) When Talking to Someone With Anxiety

The good news?

You don’t need to be a therapist to make a real difference. In this guide, you’ll learn exactly what to say — and what not to say — so you can support someone with anxiety in the most compassionate way possible.

What Not to Say

These phrases may be meant to help, but they often dismiss or minimize a person’s experience.

1. “Just calm down.”
   Anxiety can’t be switched off like a light. This phrase adds pressure instead of relief.

2. “It’s all in your head.”
   Anxiety is both mental and physical — invalidating one side ignores the reality of what they’re going through.

3. “You’re overreacting.”
   What seems small to you might feel overwhelming to them.

4. “Don’t worry about it.”
   If they could stop worrying, they already would.

5. “Other people have it worse.”
   Struggles aren’t a competition, and this can make them feel guilty on top of anxious.

What to Say Instead

Empathy and understanding go a long way. Try these phrases:

1. “I’m here for you.”
   Short, simple, and reassuring.

2. “That sounds really hard. Do you want to talk about it?”
   Offers a listening ear without pushing for details.

3. “I might not fully understand, but I care about how you’re feeling.”
   Shows empathy without pretending to know everything.

4. “Would it help if we took a short walk or did some breathing together?”
   Suggests a calming action instead of telling them to calm down.

5. “You’re not a burden. I’m glad you told me.”
   Encourages openness and trust.

Extra Tips for Talking to Someone With Anxiety

• Listen more than you speak.

• Ask what they need.

• Be patient.

• Avoid judgment.

Final Thoughts

Your words matter more than you think. By choosing compassion over clichés, you can create a safe space for someone dealing with anxiety. You don’t have to fix their feelings — simply being there, listening, and speaking with care can make their world feel a little lighter.